The Icky Conversation

A Flashback of Memory Source That Happened to be in My Hands of Information Age.

"Oh, yeah," I said. "Didn't you have a transvestite threesome?"

"No, I didn't."

I thought quickly. Didn't he know? I was slow to learn that he is far behind. "I heard from an information source that you had sex with two transvestites..." I paused questionably. "It was in Arizona, no? Do you recall the threesome?" Although I haven't been around with women that much in my life, I knew it is an insane and crazy world. Heck, I never even was in Arizona in the first place. The benefits of Bush Administration's wiretapped records on Americans through foreign contacts (or guest workers, whatever that may be) and all that in my head.

"Well, it wasn't threesome. There were three. First one, hard of hearing Spanish left the scene. Both of them, second and third ones, are bisexual."

".... aren't they Spanish, if my source is right...?"

He took a moment in thought. "The hard of hearing... I think American or Spanish, I'm not sure."

I waited.

"Second one is definitely Spanish. Third one looks Mexican... or American. No, American..."

Then he was quick into thinking on his pinky finger, apparently confused with ring finger. Last one he was confused with.

"No, they weren't transvestites."

"Technology those days, you can't tell a transvestite from women," I pointed out. Suddenly, I thought it was a while since I'd see him. He really didn't know, I realized. I feel sorry for a deaf guy to be tricked into such a bad scene.

"Anyway, no, I didn't have threesome. I didn't feel comfortable because they are lesbians, so I did second one then third one afterwards," he said.

I pointed out deliberately. "Think careful. Both of them are Spanish, no?"

He was suddenly in change of mood swing. "No, no. If I did have sex with transvestites, I would kill myself," he panicked at the knowledge that I'd lent him.

I was quick to move and shut my fat mouth as usual. "No, never mind. Drop it. I lied," I said.

"You were fooling around, weren't you? You were scaring me," he laughed. "I should have known."

"I said so because you said you wanted to kill yourself if you did,"

"You're playing with my head."

"I'm not going to say a word about it," I said. I knew how suicidal he can be. Sometimes it is impossible to straighten up and do one of those straight talks, because it hurts people. Sometimes, truth hurts. I drank too slowly for almost nine hours, that I had 11 or 12 cans or so.

After we talked about other subjects, a moment before he left to home: he was still trying to figure out who the third or the fourth one was. I was thinking, perhaps he is in a state of denial... or he tried to suppress the news far behind in his head.

And so I can't sleep as of 5:33 A.M.